Faded Memories

Day One: Ten things you want to say to ten different people right now.
Day Two: Nine things about yourself.
Day Three: Eight ways to win your heart.
Day Four: Seven things that cross your mind a lot.
Day Five: Six things you wish you’d never done.
Day Six: Five people who mean a lot (in no order whatsoever)
Day Seven: Four turn offs.
Day Eight: Three turn ons.
Day Nine: Two images that describe your life right now, and why.
Day Ten: One confession.

1. I should be in bed right now, but I'm too happy to sleep
2. I love kids. even the demon spawn I take care of now, lol
3. I'm half-blind (possibly..not sure of the actual legal/medical status
4. I'm writing a book
5. I've made up my own language for the book
6. I have round-about 15 people calling me "mommy", rofl
7. I was oh-so-lucky enough to inherit my father's teeth.
8. I am blessed with my mother's good looks.
9. I love my mommy♥

just keeping this short.

don't expect to see me around much, or, if I AM around, don't expect me to talk.

I found a friend from 20 years ago on my personal facebook.
he's the only friend I still have that knew me from before dad died.
he's the only friends I have that KNEW dad, etc.

when I found him, he told me that he had been about to hire a company to find mom and I.

his mom found out she had cancer and only about 6 months to live.
the phone number they had for my mom was disconnected.
they didn't have one for me, and I didn't have my real name on facebook, so they couldn't find either of us.
his mom died back in feb.



it's bad enough losing her, but that I wasn't there for my best friend? fuck.
and I was the one that got to break it to mom. double fuck.

yeah. I already told a couple of you, but now the rest of you know.

I'll be back eventually. not much choice. kattunlove doesn't go on hiatus just because time/life sucks ass.

*sighs*

mini-hiatus~

tomorrow is finishing up cleaning and packing, and then I'll be leaving Friday around 7pm, and won't be back online until Monday night~

*_*

If you have younger loved ones that you know looks up to you a lot, hero-worships, loves you, etc, do this:

get a camcorder of some kind.
if you guys had a song they liked to sing with you, or some lil inside joke you had, record yourself singing it/telling the joke.
talk about random mundane things.
talk about some favorite memories.
make sure to laugh at some point.
smile.
be goofy.
be you.


don't worry about how silly you may feel just talking to a recorder. trust me. when you're gone, that "silly" recording will be all your loved ones have to remember your voice by. You can take a million pictures, and sometimes a single pic CAN say a thousand words...but sometimes the words need to be said.

More importantly, sometimes they need to be heard.

my father died 16 year ago.
I USED to have a clip of him singing a line from a song. maybe 10-15 seconds long at the most.
It's gone.
he used to have a song for all of his kids.
we'll never hear him sing our song again.
we'll never be able to sing along with his voice.

It was hard enough losing him the first time...but it feels like I've lost him all over again.

I don't remember the sound of his voice. his laughter. the random goofy things he would say...nothing. It's not even a whisper of a memory anymore...and there's nothing I can do about it.

So please...please do not put your loved ones through this. I'm begging you...don't.

*flails and squirms a lil*

probably not much cause for it, but ah well...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY OIKKO~

The big 2-0, lol. still dunno if he's going to Houston with me though:\


good and bad:

good:
Kristy is gonna let me have my sundays again. I get to sleep as late as I want, but at midnight on sunday, I have to give her my keyboard and mouse, so she'll know I'm not staying up all night playing on the computer. I'm okay with that, sooo~

bad:
the other night, Brian was talking to me, and he MEANT to say "Kristy told me you...", but he said MY name instead. Kristy was right behind him. Yeah, he got smacked.

then tonight, Koda started to call her mommy my name. she's...not happy:\ obviously.

last night, we were looking at pics from when they brought Nathan home from the hospital, and Kristy said she just wished he knew his mommy. I told her he DOES know her...he always calls her "mama", and he looks at her when he says it. he also only gives his biggest smiles to her and to Koda. I get smiles of course, and I get laughs sometimes, but it's mama that gets the big big smiles.

she says she just needs a couple days alone with the kids, but when I pointed out that I'll be gone for a couple days in november, and maybe that will help, she says "no...he's probably going to go crazy while you're gone."

:S

I feel guilty, not just cause of her, but Nathan too...cause, I mean, I love the kids, but I don't think of them as mine...not even Nathan who I HAVE pretty much raised so far. I hate that he's apparently looking to me as a "mommy", but I look at him like a nephew or a brother...:S

*sighs* I dunno. this really kinda sucks:\

*grins*

took the golfcart to run over to the gas station a couple minutes ago, and when I came out to go back home, there were two younger guys (late teens to early twenties) in a truck near the cart...I started around the corner to go home, and I heard one of the guys hollering to turn on the headlights (just kidding around, not asshole-ish or anything), so I turned back around and pulled up to them:


guy: oohhh...you don't have any. don't you hit anybody out there!
me: I'm trying to get them to hit ME, that way _I_ get the money
guy: do you have a flashlight?
me: nope
guy: if I had one, I'd give it to you so you can flash people as you drive by
me: don't need a flashlight for that ;)
him: *jaw drop*
his friend: *laugh*
me: *turns around to leave again*
him: hey! how old are you??
me: old enough!
him: ...no you're not!




on the downside, someone threatened to stab sis' hubby and burn down their store. and for once, it wasn't HIS fault...HE was actually being calm and nice! (there's video proof or I wouldn't believe it either!)

the guy was bowing up on sis, and his wife was calling her a liar...neither of those things are a good idea...especially with any of us around.

Bil normally would've beaten that guy down on the spot, in front of the guys' kids and wife. oikko would've sent sis upstairs to get Bil so he would beat the guy down. I...well, I'd better not say what I'd do...don't wanna leave any kinda evidence that might make it sound like it was premeditated ;)


OH, and I learned something useful about Texas law! it was a very bad idea for sis to have told me about it because...well...it IS useful:D


when the guy threatened to stab bil, sis had her gun in her lap, cause the guy had already been giving her a hard time and making threats, so she was a lil scared (imagine that).

she told the policeman that if she saw the man trying to come back on their property, she was gonna shoot him. the officer told her that there's this stipulation (I think) called the "wall of seperation".

as long as there is something in between you and your attacker, whether it's a wall, or table, counter, etc., you canNOT shoot them. there HAS to be open ground between you and the person, cause then that person has nothing in their way to stop them from charging at you full tilt.

I told Kristy that that info is entirely too useful. cause I would tell the person "okay, hold on, gonna make sure you have a clear path here...*moves everything out of the way*...*checks for even the smallest pebble or dust speck* ...okay, we're good now." and then let them charge me.

I don't know if it applies to defending yourself with a knife/sword/dagger too though...if it does, then the only drawback to this is that if someone tries to break into the door here at OUR store? we have a chain lock. so I'd have to wait for them to break the door open before I can play "slice 'em, dice 'em" with one of the many sharp objects I keep nearby.

the original plan was that if someone tried to break through the door when I'm here alone/with the kids, I'd grab one of the swords bil gave me and stab through the gap.

now...:\ dunno.

also, they're apparently on the brink of getting fired. bil SERIOUSLY needs to learn to control his temper. *sighs*

*points up* that, btw, is why I've been MIA. too much family stuff going on that I'm not even gonna try posting about. just bear with me:\

I wonder how badly I'm gonna get bricked for saying this...

IF Jin leaves KAT-TUN, and JE doesn't let him back, he could always join in with JYJ~

I'm thinking, possible name: JAY-J

*runs*

(Jac is sooo gonna kill me for this one XD;; )

*ganked from heyjude13*

Rules: It's harder than it looks! Copy to your own note, erase my answers, enter yours, and tag 10 people(if you want). Use the first letter of your name to answer each of the following questions. They have to be real...nothing made up! If the person before you had the same first initial, you must use different answers. You cannot use any word twice and you can't use your name for the boy/girl name question.

*snorts* I'll use whatever damn name I want, lol~

1. What is your name: Anny
2. A four Letter Word: alas
3. A boy's Name: Andrew
4. A girl's Name: Adrianna
5. An occupation: artist
6. A colour: apricot
7. Something you wear: anklet
8. A food: apple
9. In the bathroom: air freshner, lol
10. A place: america
11. A reason for being late: accident
12. Something you shout: asshole!
13. A movie title: A walk to remember
14. Something you drink: apple juice
15. A musical group: adema

...I love Kristy.


she got me playing rockband with her and Brian, and I didn't realize how late it was getting.

once it was past midnight, she made sure I knew what time it was, and then they started getting ready for bed...she's been dragging ass since about 7, so I think she did it to keep me distracted ^_^;;

just gotta make it 24 hours now, and then I can be happy that I was just being paranoid.

until NEXT June 24th:(

GAH.